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This isn't actually my house, obviously - I'm not about to put that on the internet. This is the house I lived in for two weeks last month while waiting for my house to become ready. The world's most arrogant Greek failed-accountant lives there now. Feel free to burgle him - it it fully-furnished and the widescreen TV in the pictures is in the room at the end of the ground floor hall.
The cool starts before you even reach the property, as at the end of the street are a pair of statues just like the one in 'Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth'.
Also just around the corner is the Energis building. It should be noted that Energis are a telecommunications company, and as such, the looming nuclear sky should be considered coincidental.
I see dead people. Some of them don't even know they are dead.
I was slightly suprised to discover what constituted "fully furnished". There were no chairs to accompany the table in the dining room, but there were 999 satellite television channels - I suspect the telvision limit rather than the number of subscriptions carried. Over 100 of these were for buying factory surplass goods, and a further 60 were pornography. I like to imagine that a channel dedicated to "red hot over-50s interracial lesbian action" is provided to everyone as standard, otherwise I am concerned about the landlord's target audience.
In the kitchen, I found several items left for my by the previous occupant. Some of these were functional, but of much greater interest was the Mr. T fridge magnet.
Imagine my boundless joy when I opened the said fridge to discover both 'Pocari Sweat' and 'Semtex' Engrish sports energy drinks! (A letter left in the desk draw confirmed these to be the finest mildly-racist humour that eBay could provide.)
This bucket of MET-Rx ENGINEERED NUTRITION SUPREME WHEY NUTRITION SUPLIMENT - STRAWBERRY FLAVOUR was on top of my wardrobe. The block capitals make it manly, the strawberry flavour less so. If you can lift it, you don't need it.
