Music:
17.01.06:
Fake blood vs. arm socks - May the force of GWAR protect you
08.05.05:
Evergreen Terrace - The number of the Beast is 641.
18.02.05:
Sir Mixalot: 'Baby got back' - Back with a vengence.
04.01.05:
Velvet Acid Christ to write new Harry Potter soundtrack - Wait for me, you guys!
14.12.04:
Samantha Fox: Touch me - 80s topless rock'n'roll extravaganza!
23.11.04:
AFI: untitled retrospective - One... big... dark... review.
21.09.04:
Free and varied music - Guaranteed better than Creed.
27.07.04:
Special D - 1990 called, they want their songs back.
15.07.04:
Blue: Bubblin' - At least it's not Gary Barlow.
01.06.04:
Jentina, part two - I am Spartacus! No, I am Spartacus!
01.06.04:
Jentina, part one - Yo, VIP, let's kick it!
04.05.04:
Lionel Richie, part two - He's just a skater boy.
04.05.04:
Lionel Richie, part one - Is it him you're looking for?
25.04.04:
Are you ready to rock? - You won't be.
14.04.04:
Marillion - We will bleed you dry and it will never be enough.
01.03.04:
Tonight the stars revolt - Didn't these bands used to be good?
20.12.03:
Anger management - Charting the decline in musical standards.
16.11.03:
Six steps to a cooler you - A lesson in xpunkx.
12.11.03:
Amy Studt - Avril UK.
08.11.03:
Rock your socks - A fashionable misappropriation of footwear.
07.10.03:
Rapping for Jesus - Sympathy for the devil.
19.09.03:
Devildriver - The roof is on fire.
14.09.03:
Hardcore Superstar - Not Harmar Superstar.
25.08.03:
Target audience - From eyeliner to eyesore.
18.07.03:
Dave Grohl destroyed the music industry - with help from Slipknot.
10.07.03:
Musician turned actor - Model, actress, hooker, waitress.
01.07.03:
Politics and music - It's just another funky radical bombtrack.
23.06.03:
Type O Negative - Happy Halloween Manchester.
25.05.03:
Evanescence - bigmouth strikes again.
04.05.03:
Fat boys can't rock - music piracy is not the problem.
24.04.03:
Disturbed - no 'Prayer' will save you (puns are great).
18.04.03:
Hunter Revenge party like it's 1999.
16.04.03:
Forgotten heroes: Chesney Hawkes - the one and only.
03.04.03:
Godsmack -
not an Alice in Chains tribute band.
06.03.03:
Marilyn Manson - stilts are not traditionally scary.
12.02.03:
Audioslave - Fell on black days.
12.02.03:
Misfits tribute bands - Teenagers from Mars.
31.01.03:
AFI: 'Sing the sorrow' - second review published anywhere!
30.01.03:
AFI: 'Sing the sorrow' - first review published anywhere!
27.01.03:
Jack off Jill - doll parts.
22.01.03:
Children of the night Nike
05.01.03:
Death sells - Conspiracy theories for corporate profit.
17.12.02:
Guns 'n' Roses - providing a clique for everyone.
17.12.02:
Lollipop Lust Kill - redneck darkwave.
11.12.02:
Obsessive fans - like Rachel Stamp? I'm talking to you.
29.11.02:
Minor Threat vs. lazy journalism.
05.11.02:
Sentenced - "this next song is about drinking to forget..."
25.10.02:
Ben Kweller - he loves his guitar and his guitar loves him.
25.10.02:
Music merchandise sold your soul - "AFI shoes"...
17.10.02:
Replying to Deadsy's fanmail.
11.10.02:
Remix CDs - Kewl lke Lnkn Prk.
11.10.02:
These are the rules we rock'n'roll by - my interview with Alex Kane of AntiProduct.
25.09.02:
Dark Tranquility - over-hyped, under-joyed.
16.09.02:
Powerman5000 Lego® figures - £39.99 worth of suck.
15.09.02:
AFI - to appease people who can't remeber ".net", Davey's tattoos.
Film:
04.09.06:
R.I.P. Steve Irwin - Burn out, not fade away.
12.10.05:
Crichton - Don't forget he also wrote 'Disclosure'...
01.10.05:
Elmo's World - Bananas do not engage in cannibalism.
03.09.05:
Trisha: mum, are you sure you see ghosts? - The paranormal appeal of daytime TV.
14.07.05:
Dog Soldiers - With pictures from other films. Squelch.
06.07.05:
Big Brother 6 part 2 - Daily updates.
06.07.05:
Big Brother 6 part 1 - An introduction.
27.06.05:
Charity shop videos - To be continued...
16.06.05:
All that glimmers - They mostly come out night, mostly.
27.05.05:
Space - Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?
16.05.05:
We're off to see the Wizard - No more drugs for this man.
17.04.05:
Sahara - Trojan Odyssey, with 50% more camels.
03.04.05:
Eco warriors - Steven Seagal and the Planeteers.
19.03.05:
Ginger Snaps - Hide and seek, with monsters.
13.03.05:
The taking of flight 847 (part 2) - Now staring Milli Vanilli.
04.03.05:
The taking of flight 847 (part 1) - Somebody set us up the bomb.
27.02.05:
Warriors of virtue: Return to Tao - Everyone was kung fu fighting!
23.02.05:
Turbulence 3: Heavy metal - Ein Killer. Vierzig Geisien.
01.01.05:
Demon possession - Safer living through pop culture.
19.12.04:
Orgazmo - Charting the intellectual decline of holiday viewing.
28.11.04:
Red Surf - Makes 'Point Break' look like 'Blue juice'.
21.10.04:
Cyborg - When Jean-Claude Van Damme was Master of the Universe.
06.10.04:
PSI Factor - Tales of the mundane.
01.10.04:
Rock Star - Again, guaranteed better than Creed.
08.08.04:
Futuresport - In the future, no-one can hear you laugh.
18.07.04:
Red Dawn - I believe that human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
09.07.04:
Zombies ate my plot - and also the last week's site updates.
20.06.04:
Mean Girls - Fit but my god don't you know it.
05.06.04:
Ulysses 31 - Undoing all the good of classics lessons since 1981.
23.05.04:
You must die! I alone am best! - Death in film, and dying on stage.
10.05.04:
Scream - I'll be right back...
28.03.04:
Reign in darkness - Low budget accidental vampires.
23.03.04:
Hangman's Curse - The passion of The Christ.
18.03.04:
Promoting tourism subliminally - Yet more abuse of the Scooby Doo trademark.
10.02.04:
Morals with He-Man - The safe way to run, and other stories.
06.02.04:
Melting Nazis - Learning history with Hollywood.
30.01.04:
Breakdancing for the Pope - Oh well, I was going to hell anyway...
27.01.04:
Damn you, Kazaa - No-one should have to see that.
15.01.04:
Texas teenage virgins - This has nothing to do with porn.
11.01.04:
Captain Planet - The power is
yours!
04.12.03:
The good, the bad and the typecast - Let off some steam, Bennett!
23.11.03:
The Faculty - Current affairs retold though evil Nazi robots.
12.10.03:
Dominator - Faker than Metacortex.
02.10.03:
Freeway - Red Riding Hood grew up.
30.09.03:
Scooby Doo - ...pesky kids.
02.09.03:
The A-Team - I pity the fool who doesn't like this article.
16.08.03:
Head cheerleader, dead cheerleader - Dying to meat you.
10.08.03:
Ghost pirates of the Caribbean - Another groovy mystery solved.
04.08.03:
Jawbreaker - She's dead. Relax.
23.07.03:
I'm just a girl - Terminator 3 VS Legally Blonde 2.
30.05.03:
Donnie Darko - why not to trust a six foot rabbit.
19.05.03:
Natural Born Killers - he wasn't real anyway, it was the Matrix.
16.05.03:
Clarks 'Magic Shoes' - "shoes fit for a princess"
12.05.03:
Made-up reviews of films that I haven't seen - with Neo, Trinity, and Lizzie McGuire.
12.05.03:
The Martin Luther King Jr. memorial page - what I learnt from Spike Lee.
08.05.03:
Generation X: the movie - X-Men 2 could not stand comparison.
29.04.03:
Insomnia - oxymoron.
13.04.03:
Henry Rollins - daytime TV just got worse.
10.04.03:
Media Circus - a new take on knife throwing.
06.03.03:
Learning cultural mores with Mary-Kate and Ashley - volume 02: the rest.
03.03.03:
Learning cultural mores with Mary-Kate and Ashley - volume 01: France and Italy.
03.03.03:
I tried to believe - X Files jumps the shark.
20.02.03:
Women on the verge of a nervous breakdown - Anna Nicole's place in the grieving process.
29.01.03:
Transformers -
robots in disguise Japanese in robot suits.
16.01.03:
Got terror? - My part in Sept. 11.
09.01.03:
The linguistics of porn (nudity not included)
05.01.03:
Xmas film reviews - sponsored by Cravendale milk.
12.12.02:
City of Lost Children - because my parents love me.
12.12.02:
Fun with Disney - excepting 'Free Willy' 1 through 3.
06.12.02:
Scooby-Doo! - big budget cereal.
28.11.02:
Saved by the Bell - where are they now?
12.11.02:
Rainbow Brite: 'Peril in the pits' - drugs did this.
25.10.02:
Cartoons minus the vice-like WB grip.
12.10.02:
Which seminal detective are you? - find out with this handy quiz.
04.10.02:
'He-Man and the Masters of the Universe' - a socio-political analysis.
28.09.02:
Rainbow Brite: 'Star sprinkled' - a truly bewildering experience.
20.09.02:
'Sum of all Fears' and how 80,000 Americans dying diminished its success.
Internet:
01.01.06:
World of Warcraft - War. HUH! What is it good for?
03.07.05:
"Why did you block me?" - So I put on my wizard hat and robe...
28.04.05:
Gothic dating - Cradle of Filth, quoth the raven.
26.09.04:
The information superhighway - Following Arpanet just as intended.
18.09.04:
E-mail etiquette - ADV: Free Mortgage Rate Quote.
11.09.04:
Happy Birthday - Celebration of another milestone passed.
14.08.04:
The Ladybird guide to shopping on the internet - Very trustworthy transactions.
13.06.04:
Happy 18th Birthday Mary-Kate and Ashley! - Let them eat cake.
10.10.03:
Nigerian bank scam, part 2 - With marginally more success.
07.09.03:
Link-o-rama - For the first and last time.
28.08.03:
Nigerian bank scam, part 1 - Learning how to commit international fraud.
08.07.03:
e-friend application form - We care about our readers.
21.06.03:
Geocities awards - truly the mark of a good site.
20.05.03:
Here from Google? Stop now - we do not have any child pornography.
08.05.03:
hottopic.com customer services - happy to help.
20.03.03:
Hos, haters, and heretics - thankyou for ruining the internet for everyone.
11.03.03:
Drama cam the definitive webcam portal
27.02.03:
To: spam@subvulture.com Subject: Website Designed for under £300
23.02.03:
Three sisters' story - an everyday tale of Japanese perversion.
10.12.02:
eShy.com - from my bulk mail with love.
04.12.02:
An examination of the increasingly questionable adverts on Yahoo!
29.11.02:
AOL instant messenger and how I was welcomed into the AOL fold.
25.10.02:
Why the internet is a big, dark, scary place - FILTHY XXX ONE DAY FREE TRIAL OFFER CLICK HERE
Seasonal:
22.12.05:
Avoiding Xmas - Become a moving target.
07.11.05:
Halloween internet makeover - In Scary Vision, with Meccha-Streisand.
31.10.05:
Halloween haunted places - Guaranteed scarier than 'House of wax'.
24.12.04:
Christmas music - With The Chipmunks, David Hasselhoff, and Kenny G.
09.12.04:
White Xmas - A multi-cultural seasonal celebration.
02.11.04:
Halloween noises - A retrospective.
30.10.04:
Halloween festivities - Not children, but monsters.
28.12.03:
Crackers - Xmas isn't over until I say it is.
16.12.03:
Xmas gift recommendations, part 3 - gifts for adults.
11.12.03:
Xmas gift recommendations, part 2 - chosen by people who spammed me.
11.12.03:
Xmas gift recommendations, part 1 - chosen by MSNBC's 'Today Show'.
07.12.03:
Bogus Santas exposed - Keeping Xmas alive.
31.10.03:
Halloween costume ideas - not suitable for children under 5 years due to small parts.
26.02.03:
Valentine - a helpful guide for awkward singles everywhere.
09.02.03:
Celebrating the Chinese New Year through the medium of food.
News / legal / political / consumerism:
28.08.06:
At war with the Post Office - Guest article by William 'Neverclear' Cavindash.
02.03.06:
And this is how we die - Barbie as Henry the Eigth's soulless heir.
23.08.05:
New, improved and completely fake - Your company's mascot is my best friend.
31.07.05:
Wallets with pigtails - Wipeout.
11.04.05:
Let's go to Mars - The Jetsons, and other harsh realities.
21.01.05:
Fat food - Healthy eating for a better tomorrow.
09.01.05:
Random war - Because you're worth it.
28.12.04:
A Neo-Communist reading of Busted's 'Year 3000' - Comrades!
11.10.04:
All things pink and capitalist - Ted, don't fear the reaper!
12.09.04:
I RELY ON YOU!! - Regaining our political edge.
02.09.04:
Thought control - Capitalism in fiction from the Hardy Boys to the Budget Report.
17.06.04:
What price salvation? - For eternal consumption only.
12.05.04:
Jesus built my hotrod while Fox News watched.
04.04.04:
Talk to Frank - Rapping wit' da kids at street level.
25.02.04:
The new official state history of Russia - Gulags? What gulags?
23.01.04:
Dilbert - Thankyou for your rules.
25.10.03:
FBI concealable weapons guide 2003 - I helped to blow up a building.
30.07.03:
Jennifer Government - Max Barry will take your money, then preach about how corporations are bad.
26.07.03:
Am I copyright infringement or not? -
Rate Sue my ass.
04.07.03:
Kill 'em all limited - Fulfilling your every security need.
15.06.03:
Terrorist or asylum seeker? - a lighthearted quiz.
13.06.03:
Witches - Harry Potter as a fashion icon.
05.05.03:
Breaking national treasures - product placement in the new millenium.
08.04.03:
Gasmasks - e-mail spam can save your life.
03.04.03:
Operation Iraqi Freedom - go team!
29.03.03:
Oxfam - pushing the bounds of acceptable satire.
18.03.03:
la too-qaa-wim (phonetic Arabic for 'do not resist')
29.01.03:
Fun with copyright law - an animated adventure.
Product reviews:
30.08.05:
Finding God - Salvation costs only $29.99!
25.01.05:
How to hunt ghosts: a practical guide - Who you gonna call?
02.08.04:
My father-in-law's toiletries - The best a man can get.
01.05.04:
Expensive crap - Happy International Consumerism Day!
19.01.04:
Motivational audio books, part 1 - Yes, you have the power to make me rich.
06.01.04:
In classical mood - The sound of paint drying.
29.11.03:
Aerobic striptease - A product promotion by fetishists and the clinically sad.
22.10.03:
Jackie Chan Adventures Magazine - Chantastic, Chan-fans!
31.05.03:
Russian mailorder brides 2 - the return of the economic migrants.
16.05.03:
Russian mailorder brides - now
you can have a radioactive subsistance farmer!
18.03.03:
The Kerrang! Magazine club tour extravaganza - the Kurrung! magazine review.
24.01.03:
Tupperware saved my life.
18.01.03:
Mind, body, soulless - yours to collect in 80 parts.
12.01.03:
Urban hard decay candy - proudly the only clothed Dixie Chicks promotion.
05.10.02:
Japanese confectionary - express everyday thanks from one's heart bottom.
15.09.02:
Expensive nail varnish - I never knew there were so many shades of pink.
Student / Wales:
11.11.04:
House hunting - As directed by Stephen C. Miner.
28.08.04:
The Intern club - Like 'The Breakfast Club', with more "drinkies".
28.05.04:
Lidl revisited - still a plethora of bargains to be had.
07.03.04:
Free stuff - Missing the point on a corporate scale
08.06.03:
Escape from Wales - Kurt Russell had it easy.
04.06.03:
The long hard road out of Hell - the ongoing quest for employment.
20.02.03:
My breakfast diary - now ten percent healthier.
06.02.03:
The 'Which one of my last year's flatmates are you?' quiz
23.01.03:
Life in the Third World (possibly not suitable for Welsh nationalists)
04.12.02:
If you go out of the house today, you're in for a big suprise - a snapshot of life in Wales.
04.11.02:
Lidl -
the emporium for discount German-brand goods.
24.10.02:
The Ann Summers experience - Erotic adventure in the comfort of my own home.
09.10.02:
Green day - the continuing adventures of turtle boy.
20.09.02:
Features of Aberystwyth, Wales 01: Late-boy, a gothic institution in himself.
Not safe for work:
11.07.08:
Jordan sex tape - Not safe for work
11.01.06:
VIPcrew.com - Possibly safe for work
05.01.06:
Fleshlight - Not safe for work
28.12.05:
WeLiveTogether.com - Bikini shop stop - Not safe for work
28.12.05:
Restriktionen - Not safe for work
Other:
17.11.06:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 25 to 27.
17.11.06:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 23 to 24.
07.09.06:
Meet my colleagues 2 - Revenge of the jobsworths.
08.02.06:
Indigo Children - It's not a screaming child, it's a screaming saviour of mankind.
15.12.05:
Vikings - Progression through pillaging.
07.12.05:
Responsibility starts at home - the Boogieman told me to kill them all.
22.11.05:
Alligator tea party - Yum yum.
13.08.05:
Matt the lifeguard - Stranger than fiction.
07.08.05:
Hiroshima - You have no chance to survive make your time.
28.07.05:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 20 to 22.
24.07.05:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 17 to 19.
07.06.05:
Zombies - They did the Mash. It was a graveyard smash.
27.03.05:
Killing your wife/girlfriend - She's buried right in my backyard.
13.02.05:
My house rocks harder than your house - A brief photo tour.
01.02.05:
The devil made me do it - The roof is on fire.
04.12.04:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 13 to 16.
16.11.04:
Virgin Trains 'Hotline' Magazine - Unbelievably, this is free.
07.11.04:
Central heating for tramps - Quite literally the gutter press.
24.10.04:
Meet my colleagues - True Fockers.
17.10.04:
The ultimate £20 purchase - With bonus stupid haircuts.
07.09.04:
Macbeth - A Cripplelink Kids production. Seriously.
22.08.04:
London Zoo - By way of the Special Olympics.
19.08.04:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 10 to 12.
30.06.04:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 07 to 09.
27.06.04:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 04 to 06.
24.06.04:
The Adventures of Dr. Hektor Spektor - 01 to 03.
17.05.04:
When it all goes to hell - Who you gonna call?
19.04.04:
Murderer fruit machine - A new low in taste and sensitivity.
09.04.04:
The power of three - Invoking commercial success by witchcraft.
13.03.04:
Train travel, or Stuck in a confined space with life's failures.
19.02.04:
Nancy Drew - Multi-medium all-American adventuring at its best.
15.02.04:
The moose has escaped - Another day at the office.
01.01.04:
You look hideous - New year, just like the old year.
25.12.03:
Salt Mines of Siberia - The antidote to Xmas Day.
05.11.03:
I just wanted to say that... I... love... you...
15.10.03:
Sex with a eunuch - A cautionary tale of excesses.
21.09.03:
Interview with London stripper Unity - with photos, perverts.
11.09.03:
Happy birthday - Cake and balloons for all.
21.08.03:
Leigh - Cultural home to 12 pints and I'm bulletproof.
14.07.03:
Nazi balloon animals - a how to guide.
12.07.03:
Mocking the afflicted, or, I hate where you live.
29.06.03:
Gnomes - stealing underpants for fun and profit.
21.06.03:
I. Shevket Trading and other cautionary tales.
21.04.03:
Island of Misfit Mascots - Darth Vader joins Sexual Harassment Panda.
21.04.03:
Car boot sales - kill me now.
16.04.03:
Walmart - featuring Mr. Brain's pork faggots.
29.03.03:
Men as accessories - a sad indictment of celebrity.
23.03.03:
Need to belong - join the
clique cliche
14.03.03:
Going grunge for summer - the practical alternative to goth.
11.03.03:
Celebrity skin - Versace and Coke.
10.03.03:
Rituals (plus Cher and the Russian army)
01.03.03:
Eat me Cake, Alice, Alice, cake.
01.03.03:
Clowns - it is traditional for Jewish boys to be circumcised by clowns. Seriously.
06.02.03:
Collected and labelled - Kelly Osbourne is my role model.
05.01.03:
Eels - food, apparantly.
05.01.03:
Image is power - survey says: shoulderpads are... in!
01.01.03:
Your brain on (enter consumer item here)
23.11.02:
Jack Skellington in Rainbow Land - strange things are afoot at the Circle K...
16.10.02:
What would Jesus do? The Son of God answers your questions.
25.09.02:
Train journeys - Virgin Rail is my nemesis.