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Thank you for visiting our website. Please take the time to explore all the features here, and enjoy your stay with us.
I am proud to announce that I am now an ordained minister of The Universal Life Church. I qualified by having an internet connection and a valid postal address. As an ordained minister of the church, I may in turn ordain anyone who clicks here. If you do sign up, please leave a comment in the forum, as 15 referrals makes me a saint! They told me this (click to stream) and gave me a flapping dove gif to prove the validity of my claims:
As I preside over an internet-based ministry of a wack-job church, sermons and weekly teachings will not be offered. However, issues of consent aside, I will marry you to your fridge or anything else that I deem sufficiently funny or profitable from the general categories of non-traditional family spiritual guidance, wedding ceremonies, wedding renewal ceremonies, baptismals and (my personal favourite) funerals.
I have been led to believe that I can perform all these to a reasonably legally-enforceable degree (i.e. like Las Vegas Elvis weddings) in the states of Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentuckey, Louisiana, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, Ohio, Oklahoma, North Dakota, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Vermont, Virginia, Virgin Islands, Washington, Washington DC, West Virginia, Wisconsin, and Wyoming.
All services provided are limited-liability, meaning you cannot sue me. Any disputes that do arise from this site will be settled under UK law. My god will beat you all over the courtroom.
